It is good to be
clear what we mean, and emphatically do not mean, about the truth. You
will know the truth, said Jesus… the
truth will make you free[1]. We do not mean that somehow we possess a body
of truth – the bible or our beliefs, or anything else. We mean that we are finding under grace how
to become free of illusion, delusion, fantasy, and from the pernicious untruths
of prejudice and violence, hate and fear. We come to sense an alert when we ourselves
are less than true... in Leonard Cohen’s remarkable words: Going home without my burden / Going home behind the
curtain / Going home without the costume that I wore. Perhaps
we became untrue because pride got in the way, or fear of loss of face,
or of someone’s negative opinion. It may
even be a generous desire not to hurt someone else – often excused as “white”
lies. It may be that a need to be
included makes us in some way untrue to ourselves… or the need to have some power
or possession. With some, often enough,
it has become a habit of preferring fantasy-land, living my dream, imagining great
deeds, rôle-playing a life that isn’t happening or never happened.
Jesus says truth and freedom go together… freedom from falsity and illusion. When Thomas Merton finally entered the
monastery to become a novice in the Cistercian Order, he wrote his famous
sentence: So Brother Matthew locked the gate behind me and I was enclosed in the
four walls of my new freedom.[2] Merton was finally being true to
himself. Fr Laurence Freeman writes: Impatience and illusion meet their match in
meditation. It is extremely difficult to sit for any extended
time, silent and still, attending and consenting, while still hanging on grimly
to untruth, covering-up for ourselves, keeping unfair judgements of
others. Love and grace enable us to
greet reality and the present moment… gently, as we are able, and with freedom
and gratitude. The truth will make you free.
So “truth” does not mean that we are on one side of a line, a boundary,
a trumpian wall, as the “Enlightened”, let alone “Saved”, while others on the
other side are “in the wrong”, “unsaved”, or consigned to perdition. The
contemplative does not enjoy the luxury of knowing they are right and others
wrong, writes Fr Laurence. God does
not take our side against others, some will be surprised to hear. If there is any dividing line (Jesus does
talk about the sheep and the goats, the wheat and the tares, etc), it is
between those who persistently divide in the world, ignore human need, create
division -- and those who live to unite and reconcile and build up
understanding. That kind of truth is
free of the fear of difference.
I appreciate that we may nevertheless have genuine fears of insecurity
and violence… understandably so. But in
our prayer we are welcoming truth and reality, and therefore at times, it may
be, pain and risk also. The Spirit makes
us free for this, more and more, day by day.
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